This is a post that I have been hesitating about writing, for many reasons. For one thing, I am not always sure how much I want to share on here, and also, I don't want to bring anyone down. However, I promised myself when I started this blog that I would make it personal, and nothing could be more personal than this. This past week we had to make the difficult decision to put down our beloved dog, Scout. I had been fighting it all the way, ever since he was diagnosed with a brain tumor earlier in the month. The treatments were expensive, and long, and only going to buy some time. Nonetheless, I was adamant about pursuing it. However, before we could even start the radiation treatments, he had an emergency situation unrelated to the tumor which made us have to do it sooner. A friend said to me that it was almost like he knew it would be stressful, and expensive, and so he made the decision for us. I don't know if that's true, but I like to think so. Nature did make the decision for us, but that hasn't made it any easier. The fact that he was so young has made it that much harder. I truly feel like I lost a part of me when I lost him. Everywhere that I turn there is a reminder of him. It is especially hard to be in our house as his spirit is everywhere. As my husband said, he was a big presence here.
My thoughts of him have led me to think of all the dogs we love. We bring them into our homes, our lives, our hearts. They give us so much, and yet they ask so little in return. To have a wonderful dog, is to have so much added to your life. I do feel lucky to have experienced that love and to have had such a special animal be a part of our lives, even if it was cut far too short.
Thank you Scout, for everything that you gave me. You brought me joy, and laughter, and companionship, and comfort. You were my "furry child" and my best friend and I miss you more than you could ever know. I hope that we were half as good to you as you were to us.
Scouticus Finch Irwin
Labels: dogs, family, Thoughtful Sunday